i think i am going to cry

Up until last month, we have not used a credit card since last November. The debt has been going down and we have felt really good about it. Lately, that is not the case.

We have been doing a fairly good job of budgeting for the things we know are coming up, but we have been unrealistic about what we are able to afford right now and making sure we budget for the unexpected things too. We have used the RCU credit card a few times in the last 2 months with the intent to pay extra on the bill, which we have, but not enough to cover the purchases. I made a payment of almost $600 to that bill this month, but after looking at the statement, it was not enough. A Target purchase here and an ice cream stop there. All the little things add up to a big number at the end of the month. We over planned activities and camping trips with an unrealistic budget for them. I have had to buy some maternity clothes that were not budgeted for, items for the kids and here and there something else has come up that we did not plan for properly. It feels so good to be making progress that we are getting ahead of ourselves with the reality that we STILL have a very large hole to dig ourselves out of. We are not to that place where we can plan extra activities yet. We just aren't. And thinking that I can use the CC and pay extra is just foolish. If we don't have the money at that moment, then we can't buy it. Something IS going to come up between the time I use the card and the day I make a payment that will leave me short....EVERY TIME!!!

I guess this is just another lesson that has to be learned in order to really change how we handle money. Mistakes make you wise, as long as you learn from them. I have a pit in my stomach today. We went backwards on the RCU card again this month. It's a horrible feeling and a humbling experience to say the least.

I had to quit daycare altogether due to this pregnancy, so our income has gone down a lot. Realistically, there just isn't extra money for extra things this year. I have been really torn on how to balance life today and getting out of debt, but if life today and the activities in it are causing stress and a financial burden, then the answer should be very simple. It's hard to say no, not only to ourselves, but to all the friends and family who want us to be a part of things. Those things have cost us too much. We NEED to put all that on hold for while or we will never get our of this financial mess.
love
love
love